Motherhood 201

During college, I learned in Business 101 that there is no such thing as a free lunch.  Well, if there was such a class called Motherhood 101, we would all learn that there is no such thing as a sick day.  Or a vacation day. Or a day off.  Period.  

I have officially passed my first year of Motherhood 201.  I guess I can say Motherhood 101 was self-study, through observing the upbringing of all my sister's children, reading a bunch of child-rearing books, and just plain old babysitting.  But I will never forget my first ritual into Motherhood, exactly one year ago, when I woke up early on a cold Wednesday morning, and I knew it was time. 

After a few hours of pure horror and agony, my beautiful baby girl finally arrived into the world, and we named her Hana.  I was so happy.  Little did I know, I had a lot coming for me.  I never knew so much joy could also bring so much pain.  Such a cliche, but so true.  And I'm not talking about labor pain, because that pain is nothing compared to what a woman will experience for the first year of her child's life. I'm talking about those painful late nights when you've been up for so long and are so extremely tired that you don't know what time of day it is, let alone what day or month you are in.  The pain of feeling like a failure, when you just can't seem to get your house or life under control like you used to.  Or, the pain that you feel when you return to work, and you yearn to just hold your baby girl and smell her sweet smell. 

Becoming a mother took a toll on me physically, emotionally, financially, and also took a huge toll on my marriage.  But, being a mother has made me a stronger person.  It has given me the best experiences of my life.  In the last month, I've seen Hana go from baby girl to toddler, crawling, walking, feeding herself and holding her bottle.  Just these little accomplishments make me so happy and so proud to be a Mom.

These last 12 months have been the most challenging 12 months I've ever experienced.  But through it all, I've learned that to be a Mother is to be strong, humble, under-appreciated, overworked, unpaid, caring, forgiving and loving all at the same time.  And this is something you will never learn until becoming a Mother yourself.  When we get together to celebrate Hana's Birthday this weekend, not only will I be celebrating her first year of life, I'll also be celebrating my first year of accomplishments and my first official year of Motherhood. 

Her First Step!

She's got a mouthful of teeth (6 to be exact), can climb up stairs, crawl around like a rugrat and finally took her first step! Pretty soon I"ll be sending her off to college. I can't believe the day has finally come and gone - the milestone of that first step. She's becoming such a big girl. We were both excited when she took her first few steps at Uncle Ricky's house in Hayward. I screamed with excitement and she was just as excited as I was, it looked as though she wanted to take off running. When we got home, she was knocked out and so exhausted from the day. We'll have to baby proof our home so she can start exploring.

Now onto the next journey....

Ten Months

In Ten Months, so much can happen. Someone can get pregnant, and have the baby, and then get pregnant again. You can finish a whole year of high school or college. You can make the decision to take on a new venture of life, and then be on a plane to the other side of the country. In ten months, my daughter has learned how to smile, laugh, talk, clap her hands, stand and be a brat.

We’ve stopped, or at least we’ve forgotten, to celebrate every birth month. But we never forget to celebrate each new tooth, each new word, each new accomplishment. One of her first words (besides mama) is “OW”. She doesn’t know what it means. I guess she hears it from me a lot, since she’s always grabbing my face and scratching me with her long fingernails (bad mom for not cutting them often enough), or smacking me on my cheeks. She actually mimicked me and I thought it was the coolest thing in the world! So now, John and I say it over and over and wait for her to say it back. Such a small thing can create so much happiness in our household.

She stands now, holding on to the side of her crib and bounces away as if she’s dancing to her own beat. The other day she was standing on the side of her crib with her Dad watching over her. He accidentally dropped her stuffed Pooh Bear, and she caught it with one of her hands, holding on to the crib with the other! I told him she’s like the girl from heroes, and if we take her to the playground, she’ll be like Nastia Liukin on the uneven bars!

She’s gone through so many changes, and each day, it seems like she’s a different baby. For better or for worse, she’s going through a lot, which can be either really frustrating or really exciting, depending on what the milestone is. But, one thing hasn’t changed, in ten months, I still love her no less than I did the moment she was born.

Time to scrapbook

Eight months later, I've realized that I haven't been keeping track of Hana's milestones the way I wanted to before I brought Hana into this world. "Cherish every moment" "Take lots of pictures" "Enjoy them while they're young". I get all kinds of advice from grand-moms, young-moms, soon-to-be moms, future-moms. So, I'm cherishing every moment, taking tons of pics (we're up in the thousands probably) and enjoying Hana to the last tear drop and poopie diaper. But, when do I have time to scrapbook and memorialize these wonderful, yet trying, times? All her pictures are in various places throughout the house, still in their Costco envelopes. I barely have time to eat, let alone blog about these days, which I only have time to do while she's sleeping or while I'm at work, when I should be doing reports (like right now).

It's only now that I've truly understood the value of time. Lately I've been waking up every morning, with Hana laying next to me, realizing she isn't the tiny baby she was when we brought her home in October. She's barely the baby she was last month, even last week. And now I'm planning her first birthday. I guess that means I've got approximately 3 months to catch up on scrapbooking 9 months of her life. Let's see if that ever happens. At least I've got thousands of pictures and a few blogs to start with. Now if I could only find the time to put it all on pretty paper...

That once in a lifetime chance.

I was so excited about meeting The President of the Philippines today, I had to blog about it twice.  It doesn't matter how corrupt she may be, nor does it matter that most of the people at Toys R' Us didn't know who the heck she was.  Most of America wouldn't be able to figure it out. Unfortunately, I didn't know either, until John told me.  My ignorance slapped me in the face and made me realize that I've got a lot of catching up to do.

When you see her, you just know she's someone famous.  Less than 5 feet tall, she's a petite lady who emanates this aura of power, grace and extreme confidence.  Or, maybe it was the two karat diamonds she had resting on each earlobe.  Nonetheless, you knew she was someone special.  

Gloria Magcagapal-Arroyo is the president of a country, my Mother's homeland, and I had the honor of meeting her, even if it was for a hot second.  No matter what people think of her, she's still one of the most powerful women in the world.  And to be able to say "I met the President of The Philippines", that's something not everyone can say.  And that chance meeting was the type of moment that only happens once in a lifetime.  

President Arroyo meets The Estalillas

When you go to Toys R' Us for some baby bottles, don't forget your camera!

Before we left the house this afternoon to run errands, John asked me to bring the camera.  I asked "What for? We're just going to the store."  John decided to take the scenic route to Toys R' Us, which kind of annoyed me but we weren't in a rush so I went along with it.  When we got there, a bunch of secret service folks were walking around, and John said it must be a senator shopping.  When we turned the corner, it wasn't a senator at all.  It was the President of the Philippines!  John asked the bodyguard if we could take a picture, and he said quietly under his breath, without looking at John, "Wait til she turns around and ask her."  So that's exactly what he did.  John had the balls to go up to the President. He shook her hand and introduced her to Hana, and The President shook Hana's little hand.  He introduced me and I put her hand to my forehead, the only way I felt I could show her a sign of respect.  The President was waiting for her flight at SFO, which was delayed, so the First Family decided to go shopping.  What a lucky day. 

Tiny moments

Hana got her two front teeth in today!! Well, at least this was the day we noticed them. Two tiny little bottom teeth coming out. It's so cute. I can't believe how excited I was. It's the little things that really make being a mother so 'rewarding'. But, that's an understatement. It's truly an experience that is much more than rewarding. There's nothing in the world that can replace these tiny little moments.

She's starting to have a personality, too. A very happy baby that loves to laugh and sing. Hana babbles a lot, using a lot more sounds than just mama and baba. I hear her say mama a lot especially when she's upset, so I'm going to say that's her unofficial first word. When she starts to fuss, reading a book calms her down, so you can say she loves to read. It's also part of her bedtime routine (which includes washing up, quiet time, having milk, kissing daddy goodnight, and listening to mommy sing her to sleep).

She's eating a little more. Just baby foods like gerber veggies, fruits and cereal. She loves juice. You have to bribe her to get her to open her mouth, but she's eating a lot better than she used to. I can tell since she's getting longer and heavier - 16 lbs now, still a bit skinny for my taste, but at the last doctor's visit, Dr. Hung said it's normal.

She's growing so fast. So so fast. I wish I had blogged at her earlier milestones. But, I would've had to blog every day, since it's always a new day and new tiny moments that fill my heart with so much joy.

My First Blog Ever!

Wow. This is cool. Just testing it out. Needed a place to blog about being a Mom for the first time and to capture all of Hana's special events, like the first time she sucked her toe!!!

I hope you enjoy reading my blog as much as I will enjoy blogging! Wow, I welcome myself to the world of blogs. A little late, but worth the wait.